soudku

I was scared this blog would flatline (or continue to flatline) once I got back, but it turns out there’s loads of material here at home. I’ve probably only got 1-2 posts a week in me, but as Kath Day-Knight would say, treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen.

I’ve witnessed some serious butchering of the English language lately – not, as you’d assume, in my travels – but in Perth, and by people that hold down jobs!! It comes in all guises – poor grammar, incorrect pronunciation, constant use of cliches/buzz phrases (which are really just flavour of the month clichés), or office jargon. It’s appalling, and here are the top five offenders:

Mispronunciation Appreciate – as in appresiate not appresheate. This one is surprisingly common – if you are a user, pray for forgiveness and rectify the situation immediately.

Office jargon/buzz phrase Let’s unpack this – unless you need help with your luggage or picnic basket, we’re not unpacking anything.

Mispronunciation Says – as in saze not sez. I realise it looks like saze, but do you go round saying forks pass or grand pricks? If you do, I suggest you find your mother tongue, toot sweet.

Office jargon/cliché Touch base – I can’t put my finger on exactly why I hate this, but everyone knows that brussel sprouts are foul despite the lack of evidence.

Mispronunciation Vunrable instead of vulnerable – democracy doesn’t extend to grammar – the L is non-negotiable.

Buzz phrase  It’s my journey. This is used as an excuse to say/do ridiculous things because you can’t argue with subjectivity. Beg to differ. If some person came up and said to you the sky is pink, it’s not his journey. He’s an idiot.

I’m paranoid I’ve misspelt something now – let me know if I have.

Viva la grammalution!!